300 Days of Rain

My Screenplay Idea - It Could Work

2012-01-01T07:16:00.000-08:00

Revealing my ever present California roots, I have an idea for a screenplay. It would sort of be like a cross of My Name is Earl, Go and Superbad. Yes, I am taking a big risk by posting a blog about it because all sorts of writers from Los Angeles undoubtedly read my blog and will rip me off. I'm actually counting on protecting myself by publishing this post so I can sue the pants off any unscrupulous Hollywood hack writers.

Before I tell you the plot, I do have one disclaimer. I am a fan of the high school movie genre. The best usually are very John Hughes-esq - IE 16 Candles, Pretty in Pink, Ferris Buellers Day Off, Weird Science and The Breakfast Club. These are not bad movies but none of them ever won Best Picture. I like John Hughes movies because he makes light of lovable losers and making jocks look silly and playing on pop culture stereotypes. I'm not saying I was a lovable loser in high school who hated jocks and never got the pretty girl, I'm just saying that I find them funny. I even liked "I Love You, Beth Copper" with Hayden Panettiere, Friday Night Lights and Varsity Blues.

With that out of the way here is the plot.

The main character is contemplating what to do after he wakes up in his basement on new years eve. Enter best friend. They discuss some kick ass party they heave heard about that the popular kids are going to but are not invited. Then they talk how crappy it is that the year is almost over and they have not accomplished anything. So best friend, in an effort to cheer him up, makes a list of all the stuff they want to accomplish before the day is over and its a new year. Its an ambitious list and of course is filled with hilarious stuff that makes for good guy-buddy film making.

But last on the list is returning a box of pictures/keepsakes to the old girlfriend. Inevitably, they run into the olf girlfriend and it stirs his memories. Funny and loud best friend tries to keep the main character focused on the list and the big ass high school booze-fest party so they get into some more trouble and then run into girlfriend again. At some point the story becomes capturing the lost love, the perfect love that just didn't work out and less about the list. The main character is torn between the fun-loving best friend and the accomplishment of the tasks on the list and focusing his diminishing time to re-establish his love with the ex.

The crescendo is the out-of-control house party where the girlfriend just happens to show up looking drop dead sexy. In the climax the list is completed and he gets the girl back. Even the side-kick buddy gets an almost beautiful girl. Que credits, blooper reel and Sum 41 song.

This could work.

BBQ at My House

2011-11-22T09:39:00.001-08:00

I don't know how it originally came about, but I've asked my family, "Who would you invite to your BBQ?" We have semi-official categories like celebrities, chefs, entertainers, designers, pro athletes, etc. Its kind of a meaningless topic but if you did have the opportunity to have a summer BBQ at your house, who would you invite and why?

I've thought pretty hard over the years and below is my line up and short reasons why.

Chef: (Thats right, I'm not cooking) Bobby Flay

At first I thought I'd have Paula Dean because of her butter on everything and I thought about Emeril because he would make something with booze and spicy but I have to go with Bobby Flay. There is nobody better to make delicious BBQ. Plus he eats his own food, hangs out with firefighters for chili feeds and loves California cuisine. Some of you out there are probably thinking, "you are crazy, you ought to invite Giada DeLaurentiiss. She's Hot." Nah I don't need her fake smiles and constantly talking about Todd.

Entertainer: Brad Paisley

I think sitting out back, watching the stars and lights and drinking some booze with Brad would be awesome. He is a great singer, has a family and plays an awesome guitar. I thought about Kenny Chesney but he'd track sand in and I thought about Keith Urban but he'd steal all the women.

Pro Athletes: Jillian Michaels and Andre Agassi

What?!?! No hockey players? They tend to stink and would talk to much about fishing and golf. Jillian would be cool because it would be dual purposese - she could talk about working out and fitness and then she could have side conversations with the guests to work out their issues. I picked Agassi because my first love of sports was tennis. I loved the battles between Agassi, Sampras, Courer, Chang, etc. Agassi's book is really good and he has a witty sense of humor. I loved the charity tennis match with him, Pete, Federer and Nadal. Agassi was constantly cracking good jokes and making fun of the stoic Sampras. Another added bonus of having Jillian is that she wouldn't let anyone eat seconds and thirds and she could organize a group exercise/challenge after dinner.

Celebrities: Tom Hanks, Bill O'Reily and Taylor Swift

Tom could talk about World War II, being Gump, BIG, etc. Plus he is from the Bay Area and we could chit chat about that. Bill O'Reilly because I'd have to talk politics with somebody. Bob Hines would probably LOVE to engage in arguments with the Leprechaun. Yes, Taylor Swift is a singer but I'd have to have some eye candy for my hockey/guy friends. I'd let her sing with Brad Paisley.

My list constantly evolves and changes based on my mood but this is the list as of today. So did I get it right? Who would you have on your list?

The Walking Dead Blog and Occupy Wall Street

2011-10-24T21:46:00.000-07:00

Its not often I find a new TV show that I cannot wait to see every week and tell my friends about. I just found The Walking Dead on AMC. Its a zombie apocalypse storyline about a group of people trying to make it in a world overrun by the living dead.

The main character, Rick, is a cop who got shot and went into a coma and then the Zombies took over the world. He wakes up and his world is not the same. He is now on a mission to find his wife and son all the while trying to not get bitten or eaten by a walking zombie. This show KICKS ASS.

About a year ago my friend Mark gave me a copy of World War Z and the show is kind of like that, except its not a bunch of stories from around the world, it follows a group of people facing real life situations....or as real life as you can get when the world is completely infested by zombies.

My friend Brad summed it up nicely when he said, "I find the characters believable. There are no superheroes. Everyone has their moments of weakness, doubt, mistrust, self-interest, and they make mistakes just like we all would in a novel situation. And like in real life, people that you have "labeled" often surprise you when the shit gets real. Our daily lives are filled with so many assumptions... and this show challenges all of them."

The Walking Dead has also got me thinking pretty hard about things that would be otherwise unreasonable, like buying shitload of guns and amo to prepare, how to silence a .22 riffle so zombies don't hear the shots, hoarding food and medicine...you know reasonable stuff if the Pacific Northwest is overrun with Zombies.

Now I know that this blog posting is out of character. Usually I blog about shit that sucks or is ironically stupid and sucks. So I do have a twist.

In the last episode of The Walking Dead from season 1, they talked about how the Zombies are basically alive, but just the very base brain functions, like wanting blood, making meaningless noises, defecating, mulling around without any purpose and scaring people. Then I thought, HOLY SHIT! Those Occupy Wall Street kids are Zombies!

I heard some interview with a few of the Occupy kids (who by the way are probably the beginning of the first trophy kids generation) and they met all the criteria of being a zombie. They don't really do anything except mull around, make meaningless noises like "Kill Wall Street Bankers" and "We are the 99%." They also just camp out in their own stinky mess and refuse to let anyone clean up the park. Then when someone like the mayor tries to get them to leave they just dig in deeper and get more followers (multiplying like zombies). They also want stuff, like to kill bankers, tacos, street hot dogs, etc. Occupy hippy kids are zombies!

You may think its a stretch but I think I'm on to something.

Winning the Lottery

2011-10-17T09:17:00.000-07:00

So a recent episode of The Office had the warehouse staff winning the lottery and quitting their jobs. Its a pretty fantastic idea.

But isn't the lottery just throwing your money away? I tried to remember the last time I played the lottery and I think its more than a decade ago when it was one of those really big payoffs like more than 100 million. The odds of winning the jackpot in Washington are 1 in 700 million. Even the odds at winning three bucks are 1 in 28. So from a statistical standpoint, I (or you) have no chance in winning. My point is, why would someone do it? What makes you take your money you worked for and turn it over to a clerk with statistical certainty you just did the same thing as tearing it in half?

I guess I can answer a bit. I would like to think that the Public Relations/Marketing folks have something to do with it. They help to create the myth that somebody always wins. I think they had a marketing campaign titled "what would you do?" I admit, when I hear those comcommercials in the car, I start to day dream about what I would do - buying cars, houses, expensive hockey sticks, running skirts for my wife, etc. Its a crazy concept, money = happiness through stuff. However, not a new concept, just ask the Beatles - Can't Buy Me Love.

I think there are other reasons too - and perhaps I'm over-analyzing it a bit. Hopelessness. If you have no hope for a new house, new car, new expensive hockey sticks, expensive running skirts for your wife, getting your teeth fixed, etc., then the lottery gives you that hope. All you need is a few of the right numbers and it can all be yours. The lottery is the hope to a better life through stuff. But do they prey on people who have no hope at all?

The Enduring Legacy of Calvin and Hobbs

2011-10-05T20:23:00.000-07:00

When I was a kid, I loved reading the Calvin and Hobbs comics by Bill Watterson. It was a hilarious comic about a little boy (Calvin) and his stuffed tiger (Hobbs) and their exploits. Hobbs was stuffed, but came alive when adults were not looking. I looked forward to the Sunday funnies because the newspaper printed a longer comic in color. I also had the books, such as "The Essential Calvin and Hobbs" which I read over and over again. Mr. Watterson stopped producing it in 1995 so its been quite some time since there has been any new content about Calvin and Hobbs. I was actually a little sad when the comic stopped.

But for fans of Calvin and Hobbs, there is never a day without the constant reminder - the legacy lives on in images of Calvin taking a piss. Everywhere I look I see Calvin urinating on something. For the life of me I cannot remember one single comic strip where Calvin pissed on anything. Am I mistaken?

Now its quite common to see window decals and bumper stickers of Calvin pissing on Ford symbols, Chevy Symbols, the 49ers, the Raiders, the Dodgers, ex-girlfriends, the IRS and even "La Migra" which translates roughly to Immigration. (I ran across one for Jason Alexander....huh?)

This is the lasting legacy of Calvin and Hobbs? Surely Mr. Watterson didn't imagine his life's greatest achievement being thousands of images of his iconic little boy Calvin with his pants down, ass exposed and pissing on something.

Because its been so long since the last Calvin and Hobbs comic, there is now a generation of kids/people that did not even read the comic. However, they just know there is a little snot nose kid, who is the international symbol for "you suck, so I piss on you."

The Art of Self Promotion

2011-08-19T08:26:00.000-07:00

Twenty years ago Donald Trump wrote a best selling business book, The Art of the Deal. I never paid it much attention. I actually never paid him much attention until about a year ago. I knew he had his TV show and his tagline, "You're Fired!" but he just seemed like a guy with too many women troubles and a big mouth.

I don't know if he went to PR school or if its just him coming into his own but I proclaim him the King of Self Promotion. Lets look at a few examples.

I don't think Donald could win the presidency, but he keeps himself in the conversation by constantly commenting on things that are no brainers. He single-handedly got Obama to release his birth certificate. Now everytime Obama opens his mouth, Donald is there via his not-so-transparent message deliverer, Greta Van Sustren. Recently he said that Obama is incompetent and on a constant vacation. Another news story had him commenting on Kim Kardashian's wedding. WTF does the Donald have to do with that.

He has successfully accomplished the near impossible feat of having everyone value what he thinks on any subject. And the bonus is that people sometimes pay him to say what he thinks. This is the rare air that is usually reserved for the likes of Bill Clinton, Snooki and Oprah. Congratulations Donald, You're awesome!

Glass Half Full

2011-06-11T08:37:00.000-07:00

I know it sounds like a bad episode of The Office but I really dislike the half eaten donut. The worst is a person who picks it up with their hands and tears it in half and then puts it back in the box in the break room. Now the half eaten donut is covered in germs, dried out and generally a waste of my mid-morning snack.

A close cousin is the half-eaten bagel or the the second cousin - the half sliced bagel, rendering it dried out. Third cousin is the 2-liter bottle of pop where the cap is not screwed on, rendering the whole bottle flat.

If you are going to commit to eating something really bad, why just a half measure? Why not the whole donut?

No Solicitors Allowed

2011-06-04T08:31:00.000-07:00

Now that I live in a neighborhood I am finding things are different than living out in the country. One of the most curious things is that there are door-to-door salesmen. In the first few months of good weather this year we have had the blinds guy, the beef salesman, the water softener dude, a couple landscaping companies and a little girl selling pop for cheerleader camp. I see the Mormons out all the time but they have not come by yet....

When I lived in the country, I had about two people come to my door in five years. Both times I contemplated getting the gun.

There are other things that are crazy about living in town but I just cannot get past people walking around all damn day knocking on doors. I guess its the California in me but I cannot help but thinking its inherently dangerous to knock on a stranger's door and asking them to buy your crap. Just for full disclosure I did buy a couple cases of Diet Coke from the little girl. OK, so maybe they do it because it works but I wouldn't do it and would not want my kids doing it.

Hella Good

2011-04-12T21:25:00.000-07:00

Lots of us have heard the term "Man Crush." Most of the time it means some dude really likes Lance Armstrong. I get it, he is fit, snags chicks, rides bikes that cost more than a new BMW, can accomplish almost anything, etc.

But I guess to me it really means you want to be someone else because you want your life to be like theirs. Another dude I hear about is Tom Brady from the New England Patriots...because he is a great football player, married to a super model named Giselle Budchen, won like three super bowls, whatever....

BUT I've also discovered that some women do have a "Woman Crush." Most notably Gwen Stefani from the band No Doubt. Its different than a man crush but sort of similar. So Gwen Stefani is pretty, fit, married to a good looking dude, (Gavin Rossdale) sings pretty good and is all around bad ass. I kinda dig her jumping around on stage and wearing funky clothes. The other one I seem to see is Jillian Michaels from The Biggest Loser. She is pretty (IMHO), fit, probably rich and she gets to yell a lot at people on the show. Thats pretty cool.

So it begs the question...do I have a man crush? Who would it be? I thought about it for a long time. I think its Kenny Chesney. Yeah he is basically an overgrown midget but he is rich, wears boots, jeans and a cowboy hat to work, has a house in the Caribbean where he hangs out and makes super cool videos, tours the world and sings country music. In his spare time he makes documentaries about college football. Sounds good to me.

I'm interested if there are others out there among the HUGE readership of this blog.

Coping

2011-04-01T08:59:00.000-07:00

I've heard a lot in the news lately about coping. I guess it means that the mind will find a way to occupy itself when its overwhelmed or cannot deal with a situation. I guess another way to explain it is with the expression that water will always find the lowest point.

Some coping strategies I've seen are negative (stealing, smacking people around in hockey, drinking, cheating on spouses, fill-in-the-blank bad behaviour, etc.) and some are positive (athletics, working, yard work, creative projects, etc.) I tend to think that the best ways to cope are positive athletic and creative endeavors. When I get stressed, I tend to play a ton of hockey until my body cannot take it anymore. I used to blog but its pretty complicated to make something coherent and relevant.

PowerPoint

2011-02-05T20:23:00.000-08:00

Chuck Klosterman says its the worst form of writing, but I continue to write posts about agreeing with the negative.

This time its about PowerPoint. Yes, the iconic presentation software created by Microsoft. I am old enough to remember when meetings utilized overhead projections from transparencies. I guess you had the graphics department work up your "slides" and then carried them around in big ass cases with a heavy Kodak projector. Now we just take our laptop and project onto white walls and nobody pays attention.

So deep is my dislike for PowerPoint that I have several aspects that annoy me. First is the time involved. Unless you recycle content or slides, it takes about a week for a really crisp 20 page PowerPoint with nice graphics, animation, stats and pictures. That should last about twenty minutes to present to an audience. So its a huge time waster.

Second is that you cannot track changes in PowerPoint like you can in MS Word, although this is a minor point.

The biggest problem is that it turns people (both presenters and the audience) into terrible communicators. Its often said that the highest form of communication is listening. Does anyone really listen to a PowerPoint presentation? I say no. Most people I see are playing with their Blackberry or gazing off into the distance. When the lights go out, its a symbol to stop paying attention.

One of my mentors from Sprint/EMBARQ was their Consumer VP Harry Campbell. He always told people to present five things and to do them well. It is a good message to remember. Harry came out and gave his fiery speeches and kept to the five points religiously. Everyone remembered what he talked about and went out of their way to get those five things done before they left work that day.

Recently I've been working on a video project and there was some discussion as to whether a PowerPoint was needed at the end "to make sure we caught all the important points." I thought the last thing we need is to take an uplifting video and then drive it right into the sleep zone with a PowerPoint.

It should be no surprise that we will remember Ronald Regan and Bill Clinton as two of the most dynamic communicators of this generation because of their ability to connect with people when speaking, not their ability to present PowerPoint presentations.

Joaquin Phoenix is a Fraud and Real

2010-09-23T08:21:00.000-07:00

Last year I watched the David Letterman Show when Joaquin Phoenix showed up and acted totally crazy. If you saw it, you have to admit that he was convincingly terrible. It was also funny as hell watching him basically embarrass himself and look high and disheveled. I've shared the Youtube video with friends and family and they also think its hilarious.

I have to admit, I bought it. I thought he was crazy. I should have known better.

Last night, however, Joaquin goes on David Letterman again and says it was all fake. He said he has been working on a movie with Casey Affleck (Ben's little brother) about how the public views celebrity. I should have known that Joaquin was punking everyone. Joaquin is a really good actor. I thought the Johnny Cash movie "Walk the Line" was fantastic.

To his point, though, I'm not sure what his point was. Was it to prove he is a good actor? I think he already established that...Was it to have fun? Or did he really want to just do something different? But is this just like the "Blair Witch Project" sort of Fake Vs. Reality thing?

Welcome Back Lebowski

2010-05-02T20:26:00.000-07:00

Its been a REALLY long time since my last blog. I'm been totally swamped with work and stuff. I want to get back into blogging so I'm going to make a totally easy topic just to get my creative juices going again.

So the topic is best movies ever. I could be totally serious and rank them and categorize and link to a bunch of movies, etc. but I'm going to take it easy and just list ten movies of all kinds of genres.

It goes without saying that the best movie ever is The Big Lebowski. It is a Cohen Brothers movie so it does have class. It has some of the best quotes ever, it has spawned a festival and will never have a sequel so it has to be the best. I could and should blog about the Dude all on its own but again, this is just about me saddling up and getting going again. The Dude Abides.

Now that the hardest part is out to the way, I wanted to list the other nine that I would recommend to watch over and over again....Terminator 2, Breakfast at Tiffany's, The Road Warrior. The Road Warrior is cool because its post-sci-fi and retro and war and peace all at the same time...Why did Mel Gibson ever stop making movies like this. I mean its cool that you are ultra-Catholic and cheat on your wife all at the same time but why not give us what you are good at?

Rounding out the top ten is also Hoosiers, Groundhog Day, Chinatown, The Shining, Unforgiven and yes, Napoleon Dynamite. I've recently run into some people from Idaho and it makes total sense why Napoleon Dynamite was set in Idaho. Its like its a state but mostly a state of mind...out there and there without a dutiful purpose.

Death by Power Point

2010-02-15T20:39:00.000-08:00

I have worked on two Power Point projects lately. Both were similar but they extracted a heavy toll on me. First of all, I do not like Power Point. I think the lights dim and people start texting, emailing and surfing the web. Nobody pays attention. That is speaking to only the presentation itself.

The production side can be deadly too. Each division of a company has to add in a few slides to justify their existence. They also want to edit out or minimize competing projects or divisions of the company. They will also fight for order of the slides. Then the editing and approvals. It can take weeks and drive you crazy. It really did drive me crazy.

It reminded me of the "Death by Power Point" presentation I'd seen years ago. It still rings true today. I usually tell all my friends "I don't do Power Point" and nobody seems to get it until they are in charge of a big Power Point and realize how much time goes into so little. When I give my Social Media for beginners talk, I do have three slides, one with my name, one with a slide that says "Questions" with my contact info on it and one with lists of websites to write down....the rest is me engaging with the audience.....they way it used to be/should be....

Did I mention I hate Power Point?

Death by PowerPoint

View more presentations from www.kapterev.com.

Worst Christmas Song Ever

2009-12-07T19:41:00.000-08:00

This time of year is terrible for the radio. Most stations play a few Christmas songs every hour and that is annoying enough. But there are the stations that play all Christmas music all the time. Some of them even start about 8pm on October 31st....way too early.

The worst of all is George Michael's "Last Christmas." I found the video for this blog posting and its hilarious. It must have been a requirement at casting auditions to have a full mullet.

The song itself must be played enough to provide old George with plenty of money for bail and whatever he needs for the rest of the year. It kind of reminds me of that movie with Hugh Grant where his father had written the terrible Christmas song and he just lived off the Royalties (About a Boy). I guess old George is living the Christmas Miracle year after year, at least the January paycheck.

New Moon Blog

2009-11-10T19:11:00.000-08:00

Its time for another Twilight movie with Bella and Edward. This time Jacob takes center stage and becomes Bella's best friend. I came across a few really good trailers but none better than the one below. It is totally accurate for the whole movie and saves a ton of time in line waiting for the midnight showing. Enjoy.

NASA Tried to Blow Up the Moon

2009-10-19T19:57:00.000-07:00

It happened a little while ago but thank God they failed. What Am I referring to? NASA tried to blow up the moon. As a former surfer, I can attest that we need that thing to produce epic waves.

I have no idea why NASA wanted to blow up the moon but I can tell you their cover story. They said that if they shot it with a projectile going 5,600 mph then it would produce lunar dust and enough lunar debris to see if there was any water on the moon. A likely story.

I think they just wanted to shoot stuff. They have a multi-billion dollar budget and they have a ton of expensive computer equipment, so why not get a little crazy. I get that and I think the American people would understand the need to shoot stuff up and spend a ton of taxpayer money. Not some lame cock and bull story about water on the moon.

The Best Week of the Year

2009-10-03T19:12:00.000-07:00

The best week of the year is coming, are you prepared? What am I talking about? Sports week in America. This is the week in late October where the NFL, NBA, College Football, NHL, MLB and NASCAR all overlap for one week.

I would seriously take the whole week off and sit on the sofa in my sweats (ode to Chandler Bing) and watch all week long. Does ESPN have to hire more people for this week? There really is nothing better in the world for men and nothing worse in the world for women. If I were President, I would make it a national sports holiday and extend it for a week. (they extended day light savings so I would extend sports week).

I'd also just eat ice cream, pizza, microwave egg rolls, taquitos, peanut butter cups and drink beer for a full seven days straight. It may seem gross but that coupled with the prospect of seven straight days of sports, it makes total sense.

It gets me thinking....what would other people take off work for if they could? I mean I have crazy friends who go to Indiana every year for homecoming but that is just nuts.

Port Angeles Twilight Festival

2009-09-16T11:42:00.001-07:00

So its been about three months since my last blog about Twilight so I thought I would mention a few things.

I guess I had forgotten (or never paid attention) but Bella's birthday is September 13th. It just so happened that I took the family to the Olympia National Park Sunday for some hiking. We went to Lake Cresent and a few other places. Totally cool and really deserted on a Sunday afternoon. Not like Yosemite in the Summer with masses of people and trying to dodge tour buses.

Anyway, we passed through Port Angeles and saw that they were celebrating Bella's birthday with a Twilight Festival. I looked at my wife and laughed but it is not a laughing matter on the Olympic Peninsula. This is big business.

They had banners in town strung across the streets, people walking around with balloons and painted faces, etc. Then we noted "Bella Italia" restaurant and other Twilight themed restaurants. I've heard that Forks had had approximately 50,000 visitors this year to check out Twilight spots. Crazy.

So I Binged "Port Angeles Twilight Festival" and this is what I got.

I guess I should have planned to renew my wedding vows with the wife and had my kids be in the wedding party. Or I could take Bella CPR or Bella self defense classes.

Totally Nuts!

Coast Guard Cool Photos

2009-09-15T10:17:00.001-07:00

Nothing groundbreaking here today except these cool photos from my Coast Guard friend Tom. These were taken during "surf" training near Bodega Bay north of San Francisco. I'd be really sick if I were on that boat. Photos taken by BMC Erik Watson.

New Job

2009-09-10T09:34:00.000-07:00

I have finally gotten a new job. I was looking for quite some time. It feels pretty damn nice. In the telecom world, there are so many mergers and acquisitions that it was just a matter of time before my company was sold, which is what happened.

So the new job means a new place to move to and many new opportunities. There is really nothing better (in a professional sense) than someone telling you that they want you (meaning a job offer). I feel really blessed to have found a job in this bad job market.

More details to come soon.

Michael Vick Blog

2009-08-17T13:31:00.001-07:00

This week the NFL re-instated former Falcons star quarterback Michael Vick. Later, he signed a two year contract with the Philadelphia Eagles. He was suspended and spent roughly two years in prison for his involvement in dog fighting and animal cruelty.

Nobody can defend what Michael Vick did. He himself said it was deplorable and also said he cried in prison while asking God for forgiveness. A credible argument can be made that he paid his debt to society and now he is on a better track in his life. I do wish him success.

Also this week Cleveland Browns wide reciever Donte Stallworth was suspended for a year without pay for killing a person while under the influence. He spent 24 days in jail.

What I have to point out is the obvious, dogs vs. a person. I am not happy that either of these turned out the way it did. But where was the whole 60 minutes special about the family of Mario Reyes who was killed by Stallworth? Maybe the media had something to do with this but it sure seems like society is valuing dogs alot more than a person. Shameful.

Music Can Take You Places

2009-07-26T21:40:00.000-07:00

I am still feeling very musical. Maybe its because I've been in the car so much lately. Maybe its because its summer time and I have done most of my road trips in the summer.

My first car was a 1989 Volkswagen Fox. It was a terrible car for a few reasons. It was great that I had my own car but it had so many problems. It was a 1.6 liter four banger, four speed, no tachometer and the rear tail light covers leaked water whenever it rained. Then the light bulbs inside the tail lights burnt out. It happened every time it rained without a doubt. I got numerous fix it tickets. It did not have A/C or power steering either.

But as a typical teenager, I spent way too much money on the sound system. I had two 10-inch woofers in the back and two six-inch Pioneer three-way speakers in the front. I had a CD changer and a big amplifier so it was really loud. Beyond the sound system, it was not much of a car.

Anyway, I heard a song today that just about stabbed me in the head with a recollection of the past. I heard U2's Red Hill Mining Town.

When I had my VW Fox, I always had my CD changer filled with six CDs, one of which was U2's Joshua Tree. I think the Joshua Tree is American Folk music now. Many people have said that the Joshua Tree is one of the most influential CDs ever.

In the Summer of 1993 I drove between my parents cabin and Boy Scout camp on Highway 108 and 120. There is a cut off on highway 49 that kind of saves some time and its out in the middle of nowhere. Its in the dry foothills of the western Sierra Nevada mountains. You can drive for hours and just see yellow fields and barren rocks of what looks like moonscape. I drove this road in 100 degree heat with the windows down, music blaring, sweating, and feeling melancholy happiness. I was incredibly liberated to be away from home, on my own. But at the same time, I was missing something. Is that not a theme of the Joshua Tree in general?

So today it was hot, not 100 and I had the A/C on but it was hot and I heard Red Hill Mining Town. For a short minute, I was back in Tuolumne County in my VW Fox, singing U2.

Not as romantic but Jo Dee Mesina's "I'm Alright" always reminds me of Eureka/Arcata. Sugarland's "Baby Girl" always reminds me of the summer of 2005 driving through Oregon and Washington.

Another kind of funny story is that Better than Ezra's "Good" always reminds me of Office Depot. The reason is that when I worked there, some HP computers were loaded with a demo I could not turn off and it was a video of that song. It was like the scene from 40 year old Virgin where Michael McDonald is on all the time on all the big screen TV's in the home electronics store. I had to endure 8 hours of that song about 4-5 times a week for like six months straight. I liked the "Good" song before those computers were put out to display, hated it when I was at work, but I like it now again for nostalgic reasons. Anything from Led Zepplin's "Physical Graffiti" reminds me of the summer of 1989 and so does Pink Floyd's "Wish You Were Here."

I'm wondering if there are any other people out there that have places/times associated with those songs. Just curious...

Best Bands I've Never Seen

2009-07-24T12:46:00.001-07:00

I have been feeling really musical lately. I went to spinning Tuesday night and the instructor usually plays AC/DC but this time a mix from the 80's including Midnight Oil. Made me think about them since they were the best band I've seen live by a country mile.

I know what you are thinking, that Aussie one hit wonder who sang "Beds Are Burning?" Yeah that is the band but hardly a one hit wonder. It would take me 2,000 words to describe them live so I will not do that. But I will say it was electric. Peter Garrett would dance around like he was on fire and scream and sing and then stop and lecture about environmentalism or something Aussie I could not get. Just fantastic. Its sad that they retired and I will not see them again.

As a short side note, I do want to thank Zack for dragging me to so many concerts, without whom, I probably would have just stayed home and watched bad TV.

Then I got to start thinking about the bands I'd like to see live but have yet to do so. My very first thought is U2. Not sure that I want to see them stadium style with 60,000 other people. But I guess that is how they roll now. I'd be interested if anyone out there has seen them in a small setting.

I saw Morrissey at the Capitol Ballroom in SE DC 1998. That was awesome because it was so small and I was so close to Moz. I guess that is how I want to see U2, at a small venue where I can really soak it up. I'm afraid that will probably never happen.

Cover Band

2009-07-15T14:43:00.000-07:00

I am about to pay 20 dollars for two tickets to see a cover band. According to the website of the band (not going to say who as its irrelevant to the question) they are a "tribute band." I thought about what the difference is. Then I remembered the Movie "Rock Star" staring Mark Wahlberg.

In the movie his hometown "tribute band" kicks him out because he wants to just play covers and they want to play original material. The movie goes on to show plenty of glam band sex, drugs and rock and roll sort of hoopla. Its worth a rental.

Anyway, is the difference between a cover band and a tribute band pretty simple: cover bands just plays other bands music and a tribute band plays music from just one other band? Or does the tribute band have something more genuine and altruistic? What does the original band think of the other bands basically impersonating them and reaping the rewards? Do they make their own CDs and sell them for profit? In general, you would not have this sort of thing in the art world, where it would be considered fraudulent or in books. I could not imagine a book about a CIA analyst named Jack Ryan, set in DC but not written by Tom Clancy.

My question is this: Is this worth my 20 bucks? I'll probably have a good time and be entertained. Is that enough?

What You Ate for Lunch, and Did You Like It?

2009-07-09T22:12:00.001-07:00

Has it come down to this? About 25% of all the Facebook posts I read now are about what people are eating. Then they say if they liked it or not. Then about five to ten comments which range from, "mmm wish I was there, good job with the flank steak fajitas!", to "I remember when I ate at that place with my husband on our anniversary. Have a great time and make sure you tip the blonde waitress well, that is my cousin's babysitter."

I do understand that without food, we would die. I also understand that people eat generally three times a day so there is much thought put into stuffing our faces with caloric content. But do we all need to hear about it? Do we need to tweet about it? What is so enthralling about food that it cannot wait until you see your co-workers the next day or your best friends? Does everyone have to text, crackberry or log-on to update in real time what you are eating.

Michael Jackson Blog

2009-06-29T10:59:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine told me in 2002, "The only way he can salvage his legacy now, is by dying a tragic death." My friend was speaking about the allegations of child abuse and the related trial. It seems prophetic now.

After a weekend to think about it. There is really only one way to categorize Michael Jackson: The music or the man. Its really hard to take the music seriously if you take the man seriously. Why would someone purposefully buy music from someone as crazy and troubled as Michael? You cannot do it.

So I thought about his music. I thought about "PYT", "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough", "Wanna Rock with You", "Billie Jean", "Beat it" and "ABC." I never turn the radio to another station when those songs are on. His songs are fantastic, his musicality is great and he was a phenomenal dancer. I vividly remember my family buying "Thriller" and listening to it on our record player. My older brother was more of a rock fan but even he seemed to like it. During my senior year in high school my class did a "Remember the Time" themed Fantastiks skit that was awesome.

But as a man, he was nuts. I cannot overlook the different allegations of child abuse. The first of which he paid off the family and the second he was acquitted in court. He had a primetime interview where he said he liked to have milk and cookies in bed with a small child (not his). There was also the occurrence where he held his baby over a rail in a European hotel room from several stories above ground. If dropped, the child most certainly would have died. Michael has also had so many surgical procedures done on his face that he does not even look like a real person anymore, just a faint ghost with a messed up nose. And there are so many other crazy strange stories about Michael Jackson that I cannot even recount them all.

Now the question for people around the world is this: Will he be remembered as perhaps the best pop music artist ever or the crazy man, who had a side career as a good singer too.

Kidnapping Sean Goldman

2009-06-25T12:21:00.000-07:00

If you have not heard the story of how Sean Goldman was kidnapped from his Father David Goldman, you have really missed some of the worst news anyone could possibly hear. Why am I bringing it up then? Because I am a dad and it makes me terribly mad and because it appears that its coming to a head and may be resolved sometime soon.

In a nutshell, an American man, David Goldman, married a Brazilian lady and and they had a child in New Jersey, Sean Goldman. She takes the kid to Brazil for vacation, never comes back, divorces David (against his will in Brazil), marries a new guy, and then she dies (during the birth of a new child).

So the child should rightfully go back to the birth father in New Jersey right? Well I guess the new Brazilian husband is well-connected (his dad is a judge) and knows how to work the system. But according to an international treaty from the Hague, in which Brazil is a signatory, the kid belongs with the birth dad, David Goldman since the kidnapper has no relation to Sean at all. So the kid is being held hostage in Brazil for like four years now. This is nuts.

Recently the Brazilian kidnapper when on TV and said that Sean Goldman "wants to stay in Brazil." At first I thought well Sean probably does, since he is like eight years old and has all his friends and activities there.

But then after a long drive I thought more rationally and thought that whatever the kid wants is pretty irrelevant. For example when I take my kids to Chuck E .Cheese, they want to stay there forever too. They want to eat pizza and ice cream for dinner every night. They want lots of things. But its the right of the parent, David Goldman, not this other dude, to decide what is right for his kidnapped son.

I encourage everyone to contact their congressman and have them support HR2702 to help bring Sean Goldman home to his real dad, David Goldman.

Film Industry News

2009-06-23T09:08:00.000-07:00

Late last week I went to a meeting with the Washington Department of Commerce. It was a brainstorming session about ways to improve the general economic condition in Washington State.

A few others in the room just complained about matching grants for sewer systems. The Director, a former executive at a company ending with "Soft" wrote notes and then scolded the room for using the word "Innovative", which he contends means "does not make money."

Anyway, when it was my turn to speak I mentioned how the Twilight books were filmed in Oregon and British Columbia because of excessive taxes and regulations in Washington State. Then I said how about a task force on film such as the task force on Aerospace that was recently put together, in order to find out some facts and also to draw more film crews to Washington.

What I didn't expect was a tongue lashing from the Director about how I should focus on getting books written in Washington State (he meant the setting I assume) and how the Twilight producers came to Washington and attempted to extort the state into unreasonable concessions. Then he asked me if I knew anything at all about the film industry and that I should find out first.

Geez dude! Just making a suggestion. Yes, I know that states do have incentive programs. But the first film spent 20 million in Oregon and expects to spend 50 million in BC. That sounds like a pretty good bargain to me. At least I was not complaining about matching sewer grants.

So my question is there anyone out there that does know anything about the film production industry and do they attempt to extort towns/locations for the privilege of filming?

Lastly, I saw this video on the news and thought it was hilarious.

Iran Election Blog

2009-06-18T11:02:00.000-07:00

Its pretty clear from all the fuss that the election in Iran was stolen. I was thinking to myself, what would Rick Steves be saying now?

If you believe him, everyone in that country is happy with the religious repression, lack of rights and general isolation from the outside world.

What is interesting to me is that although the Mullahs are the people who started the "Revolution" in 1979, they are now in a similar position, defending their illegitimate authority to a mostly young populace.

My hope is that there is a peaceful transition to a new democratic government in Iran. A government that is friendly to the west, to Israel and does not want to build a nuclear bomb.

Twilight Convention

2009-06-04T10:36:00.000-07:00

There was a lot of buzz this week about Twilight and New Moon at the MTV Movie Awards when Twilight won like six awards. They played the new trailer for New Moon and it does look as corny as Twilight but also has some good potential. So what if they are filming it in BC because Washington State has too many taxes....its still about Forks and the Pacific Northwest.

For regular readers of this blog, no I am not turning it into a Twilight Blog.

I've had this business idea that there should be a Twilight Convention. I'm too late because a PR firm has already organized one for this summer, in Dallas. Yes, Dallas Texas.

My idea was to have people meet up in Seattle and have the convention part at the Seattle Convention center. Then take the Victoria Clipper over to Port Angeles and then buses over to Forks for sightseeing trips to the High School, Bella's house, the Hospital, the rain forest, etc. I can just see busloads of people snapping pictures and the locals making a ton of money on Mushroom Ravioli. Is this something that the Forks/Port Angeles/Seattle Chamber of Commerce wants to take on? Is it too late now that there is a Dallas event?

I tend to think its not too late. If the event was in the fall in Washington, there would still be some really nice weather and most likely some rain, which is a central theme to the books.

Jessica Biel is Too Pretty

2009-06-03T15:44:00.000-07:00

In a recent article in Allure, Jessica Biel said her good looks "are a big problem." She clarified that she does not get serious roles and that its hurtful she is not called to audition for such roles.

I'm sorry but didn't you just make a movie as a stripper and go nude?

She went on, allegedly, and described other problems in her life, like "I've got too much money. I am constantly tripping over stacks of it in my house."

Amazingly she didn't stop there saying, "My beer is too cold and there is too much sunshine in Southern California."

Whale Wars Blog

2009-05-31T21:48:00.000-07:00

What do you get when you combine a rich trust fund captain with marginal captains' abilities, twenty or so misguided high school drop-outs and mix in some TV cameras? Whale Wars on Animal Planet. I am not going to link to the show because YOU SHOULD NOT WATCH THIS SHOW. This is the second season and I did watch a few of the shows the first season because I read about it in the USA Today and wanted to see if it is as dumb as promised....that answer is yes by the way.

So the premise is that this ship goes around the Antarctic looking for Japanese whaling ships and then generally attempts to stop them from getting a whale. No I do not support Japan (or anyone) killing whales. But the captain of the ship is so irresponsible and so blatantly misguided that I cannot help but speak out. He is literally putting the lives of many young people at risk by sending them out in the line of fire or in bad seas in little inflatable rafts. Then the captain thinks that this is going to actually effect some political change. All it is going to do is likely get a few of these impressionable kids killed. They barely know how to use the radio and GPS. They must have a "find home" button on their ship because they have no place out on the high seas.

Texting

2009-05-26T14:19:00.000-07:00

Another article today regarding the dangers of texting. Its already well established that teens do not do anything all damn day long except for text, listen to iPods and wear strange clothing. I went to a conference and the speaker said something like "you always know what is going to be big when it hits Japanese teen girls....then you bet the farm." That was a several years ago and he was talking about texting.

What hits me about the article is that 50% of teens text during class and that the average amount of texts sent/received in a month is 2,272. I do not think I've sent or received that many ever.

The article also states that teens are like Pavlov's dogs, they are trained to sit up all night and wait for texts and if they do not get texts all the time, then they feel socially isolated, out of the loop and become depressed. I'm not a parent of a teenager yet, but what are these parents doing? Is the cell phone so addictive that even school, sleep and regular relationships become irrelevant?

Bears in the Woods

2009-05-19T10:52:00.000-07:00

There was a front page article in the Seattle Times today about a black bear running around the city and getting into trouble. I think that is just what bears do. They follow their nose and look for things to eat. I guess this bear might be looking for some of that fish at Pike Place Market or a mocha at Starbucks.

I remember a few years ago there was a bear that was running around downtown Salinas. I think he got shot by the police.

Out in the sticks where I live, bears are pretty common. My yard sits between the woods and a salmon hatchery so I get lots of bears going across my pumpkin patch or my lawn during the spring and summer salmon runs to gorge themselves. They usually leave their droppings and footprints. No big deal. Last week, however, one of them puked on my lawn. How do I know its a bear? Well it was a big ass pile of smelly puke, too much to be from a coyote or raccoon and definitely not a human because there was alot of stuff in there that humans would not eat.

I understand that we all get sick once in a while but geez, at least puke out int he woods so I do not have to smell your stinky puke on my lawn until it decomposes. Its raining today so maybe some of it will wash away soon.

Seattle

2009-05-12T22:27:00.000-07:00

I went to a meeting today in Seattle for work. My meeting was in a really big building on the 36th floor in the middle of downtown among the big banks, law firms, etc.

I felt slightly like a fish out of water in the big city. For one, I was not wearing all black and walking down the street on my iPhone, nor did I park my BMW/Volvo/Mercedes in the underground garage. It was $22 to park about three hours by the way. No, I did not wear a straw hat and overalls but I did feel a little out of place since I live in a small town.

After my meeting was over I got invited to a fundraiser luncheon for the Democrat Governor that same day. Since I did not have to pay and I was already down there, I decided to go. I am pretty sure that I was one of the only Republicans in the place but nobody really knows my party affiliation in that crowd. Anyway, the speeches were surprisingly short, except for the Governor who talked on and on about how she governs better than anyone thought/said she could. Then she thanked her lawyers and the unions who put her in office. Just when I was about to puke for the self-congratulation, it ended with a call by her for volunteerism as a way out of the recession.

How do I end up at these things?

Restaurants with Kids Part Two

2009-05-08T14:50:00.000-07:00

I took a look at my iGoogle webmaster tools and saw some interesting things about my blog. From its inception, most people come to my blog to read the specific post about kids at restaurants. Every month its either at the top or near the top of the search rankings for my site. Now I know it was a good post but really is that what interests most people out of anything I've written?

So I'll take this with a grain of salt and approach this like I am in sales....give 'em what they want.

Last night I went to a Vietnamese restaurant and brought my kids. I was also with another friend and her two kids so four kids among three adults. Our kids were throwing rice, complaining, spilling water, putting chop sticks in water cups and generally acting like kids. Right next to us was a family of seven (no not Jon and Kate Plus 8)....thats right, two parents and five kids. They had three boys all about 3-7 years old and two girls about 2 years old.

Not that that was amazing enough but the whole family was completely quiet. No fussing, no complaining, no throwing. They all ate silently and they ate well. I was amazed and jealous at the same time. I usually think its an accomplishment in itself if I make it out of a restaurant without my kids spilling something on the food or even worse on me.

So I talked with my wife and our friend and thought they had to have drugged those little kids (kidding!) to keep them so quiet and well mannered. How else could you keep five kids all between 2-7 years old completely quiet and satisfied while eating out?

Parenting Would Be So Easy If Only.....

2009-05-08T12:14:00.000-07:00

Parenting is a breeze, says Michelle Obama. All you have to do is have a Chief of Staff, a personal assitant and plenty of staff around. I bet it would be easy and "blessed."

Actually, this is what she said, "I have a chief of staff and a personal assistant, and everyone needs that." HELL YEAH they do. I thought granny was going to move in to the White House and everyone was going to live a normal life? I wonder how normal of a life their two daughters are going to have being raised by staff and assistants.

I don't know much about the lady but this just rubs me the wrong way. I guess that is why I've never run for an elected office. I do not want to put my family in the spotlight. Yes its tough but no it is not required. I thought she was some kind of hospital executive that got earmark money from when Obama was a senator....that should be plenty.

The Sum of All Fears

2009-05-07T10:13:00.000-07:00

It was picture day for Pre-K for my oldest son this week. The pictures are so cute and just make you want to hug and cry at the same time. They dress the kids up in little cap and gowns and they hold little rolled up diplomas.

But as a total buzz kill, they included ID cards for you with your kids picture and instructions on what to do if your kid goes missing. What came to my mind is how sad it is that some messed up predator can look at a child and think of the worst possible things and force a parent into calling the police or the Polly Klass foundation or whatever.

It just convinces me that there really is evil in the world and the most important job we have is to protect the innocent from it. Hug your kids tonight.

Happy Cinco de Cuatro

2009-05-05T15:14:00.000-07:00

What the hell does that mean?

It means, loosely translated, that if George Bush said "Happy Cinco de Cuatro" like Obama did yesterday, there would be a huge media outrage and the obligatory Saturday Night Live skit about how Bush is an idiot.

What I think happened is that Obama was trying to make a joke, without use of his trusty teleprompter, and just messed up big time.

I've never been a big media conspiracy person but it is painfully obvious that Obama gets a pass. Even Bill Clinton got nailed to the wall a few times by the press, so why can't the press find a backbone and just nail Obama too? I bet it would make headlines and feel good. Give it a try Keith Oberman.

But seriously, as someone from California we all know that Cinco de Mayo celebrates the five days war when Corona defeated the combined armies of Coors, Anheuser-Busch , Miller, Pabst and Samuel Adams to gain majority market share in the Southern California beer market.

Internet Addicted Housewives

2009-05-01T11:18:00.000-07:00

So much for staying at home and watching Oprah, daytime Soaps and eating bon bons....now we have a new danger to lookout for...Internet Addicted Moms. (full disclosure...I have a 'thing' for Diet Coke)

In a story on CNN, it was reported that these moms are logging in to Twitter, Facebook, Myspace, email and something called Second Life. I have never heard of Second Life but it seems to be a pretty big deal. I guess you log on a create an alter ego who spends the day shopping for designer shoes and purses...and also have a husband/boyfriend and kids...and they are all part of your "second life."

It sounds like escapism from the responsibilities of parenting....I totally get it. Moms do not get enough thanks and praise for all the work they do raising families. They are the hardest workers in the home by far.

But are these moms' really addicts? Maybe. I have seen business people go a bit nuts without their crackberries.

I can speak to Facebook/myspace users. Doing either of those takes a ton of time. Hours and hours of time can be spent prospecting for friends. The "friend prospector" is a whole creature of itself whose only goal is to find as many friends, no matter how vague the relationship, as possible. I admit, I've wasted away an hour in a blink of an eye reading updates. Another aspect which I've noticed is the constant updating with things like "going to fold the laundry now." Or such trivial things as "Had a good day." Ok...what ever happened to real communication? Something also happens when you join a social media site...real communication stops and your friends and you start communicating only in small snippets such as "way to go, get that laundry done" or "ah, have a better day Bestsy." Really, its that bad.

And while all this updating, friend prospecting, blogging (and some of them are really time intensive with photos, recipes, product reviews, family updates, etc.) who is watching the kids? Are they just plopped down in front of the tube or left to their own devices to run wild?

No, I am not complaining or saying that its right or wrong but it is happening because its happening in my little sleepy town in the shadow of Seattle. If its going to keep going, we had better educate ourselves and our kids on how to have meaningful relationships with 140 characters or less (Twitter).

Miss California Carrie Prejean

2009-04-22T09:46:00.000-07:00

No I did not watch the Miss USA pageant. But yes I am fascinated with the response that Miss California, Carrie Prejean, is getting for being runner up.

So she was asked by ultra-lib blogger Perez Hilton (not his real name) what she thought about Vermont sanctioning same sex marriage. Carrie says something like its great that in American we can choose who we want to be with but no offense, my upbringing and beliefs say marriage is between a man and a woman.

So several things jump out at me. First is why on Earth do we have a professional blogger as a judge. If you've seen his blog (I am not going to hyperlink it) it is all about trying to bring people down and draw silly pictures on peoples faces or take "upskirt pictures" of Hollywood actresses. Not very much socially redeeming value.

I also thought the liberal crowd was the group most associated with openness, inclusion, diversity of thought, etc. So the next day Perez Hilton goes on his blog, which supposedly gets millions of hits per month, and calls her a bitch and a c@&*. Carrie's pageant sponsors, former Playboy Bunny Shanna Moakler starts twittering and says she is a horrible person. So much for diversity of thought.

And if you take a look at what this gal is doing, going to school to be a special education teacher and involved with a charity in San Diego for kids with learning disabilities. Its really shameful the way this girl has been treated.

Now she is making the media rounds on Today Show and various Fox news shows. I did see the Fox News segment with Neil Cavuto and she did a good job. She came across as smart, pretty, sincere and likable. All the things that Perez Hilton is not. She also said that this was a blessing in disguise being asked this question because now she is really able to express who she really is (without a bathing suit on) and probably going to be very very successful.

Pirates, Three Things

2009-04-15T11:18:00.000-07:00

The recent news about the Pirates attacking a US tanker ship off the coast of Somalia has been huge news. What is there not to like about a pirate ship story? The media and the American public have been eating it up. A little known fact is that the US Marines got the nickname "Leathernecks" fighting pirates off the Barbary coast about two hundred years ago. So this is not the first time the US has had this problem but definitely its been a long time.

My first thought is that Obama should rightfully get a pat on the back and some credit. I would have thought he might have sent some old washed up senator to the area and had a summit and premised humanitarian relief or deeper understanding for the poor pirates. But he did authorize deadly force. He does get some credit.

More credit should rightfully be given the US Navy and the Navy Seals. I live in a Navy county and have a ton of respect for them. I've never heard of such good shots as the Navy Seals snipers since Lee Harvey Oswald. Three snipers shot three guys all at the same time, and the target was moving and at night. I'm sure they had night vision and thermal imaging and who knows what else but damn if that is not something I could not do with my riffle. Those guys are awesome.

Last thing I wanted to mention is what would have happened if the snipers either didn't get the pirates or the operation goes south in some way. Well I think Obama gets a political win for that too. Not that having the Captain die is a win. That is definitely a bad thing. But then Obama can say that the Navy screwed it up, and it gives him an excuse to dismantle even more of our armed services....then he says something like a full investigation and the Captain of the Bainbridge has been removed from duty....etc. So he plays if off to his constituency on the left as him taking a stand against the vicious armed services.

Are Newspapers Dead?

2009-04-14T12:09:00.000-07:00

I recently started getting the Seattle Times at my home. Its kind of nice to have something in front of you when you eat breakfast. Alot of the time its depressing. It hit me this morning, though, that I had changed.

I was reading an article and I got about half way through it and it said "go to page 10 to continue." WTF? You mean I can't scroll down? My initial thought was, this web page sucks, why isn't there a hyperlink? Thats when it hit me.

When I was a kid, the paper was huge, (not the Seattle Times) at least five sections with multiple sections for want ads, car ads, Fry's Electronics ads.....now its about half a page of ads. I know that is due to Craigslist. The paper this morning was only three sections total. Now that the Seattle PI is gone, is it just a matter of time before all papers will go online only?

Twilight Part Two

2009-04-06T13:15:00.000-07:00

Over the weekend, I checked out Twilight on DVD. The movie generated so much publicity and buzz in Washington State for its theatrical release that it did in fact carry over to the DVD release as well. Wal Mart had special commercials and was selling it for 17 dollars.

In general, it was a good movie. Yes, it is a teen movie. My friends had been telling me that it was a teen movie and why would you want to see it or read it. There were some pretty dumb scenes where Edward ran up hills like he was a cartoon roadrunner. But I didn't turn it off and it did keep me interested.

In any event, they set up the last half of the movie beautifully for a conflict, resolution and of course a sequel. I guess if I were a teenage girl I would be all over Edward for his longing looks at Bella and his coiffed hair, which was Morrissey-esque and his sultry voice. But I don't see how teenage boys would want to go pay ten bucks to watch breathless Bella. Overall good and intriguing.

I do have a very important question to ask though. What does Bella smell like? Apparently she drove all the vampires in Forks, Washington crazy with her smell. So much so that one of the "bad" vampires had to chase her all the way to Arizona instead of taking his pick of any number of soggy residents from Forks. The smell thing went really far....one of Edward's sisters said, "I could smell her the moment she walked on the field." So is that some kind of pheromones or just general pasty white teenage girl smell?

Kids Say the Funniest Things

2009-03-27T10:22:00.000-07:00

I was driving with my oldest son (five years old now) this last weekend in my truck and we were listening to country music on the radio....does this sound like a country song already....and the song on the radio was the Brooks and Dunn song "Cowgirls Don't Cry" along with Reba McEntire.

The song is going on as my son is quietly looking out the window and he smiles and looks at me and says, "Daddy, why don't cowgirls cry?"

Just when I thought he wasn't listening he really was and taking the words of the song seriously. I had to think of something quick so I said, "Cowgirls don't cry because they are tough and too busy riding horses." It worked for him.

Rick Steves Is an Idiot

2009-03-21T21:42:00.000-07:00

I was channel surfing the other day and I saw that Rick Steves had a recent show about his trip to Iran. Yes, the Islamic Republic of Iran. It does not surprise me that he went there and that he was so pompous about it. As a bit of background, Rick is a famous travel writer who has bases his business out of Edmonds, Washington, just north of Seattle. Rick got into some hot water a few years ago when he personally removed 50 American Flags placed by the Edmonds Lions Club from a public right of way. I think his response to everyone saying he was an idiot was something like flags represent the Bush agenda. Whatever. He is also a big dope smoker and writes articles about how dope should be smoked and should be legal.

But back to his show about Iran. I do think that five minutes or less would have been sufficient to talk about the history of Iran leading up to where we are now. But he spent way too much time demonizing the Shah of Iran and making the Ayatollah out to be a savior. He only noted that Americans were held hostage for 444 days in passing. Then he went on to talk about how great and modern Iranian society is. He did show any number of horrific murals in downtown Tehran where American Flags were overlayed with skulls and martyrs who killed Iraqis or Israelis are prominent saying it was the way the Iranian government intertwined religion with politics. I am pretty shocked he made it out alive with his pompous demeanor.

During the break when the public TV guy was interviewing him, Rick said he loved going to Iran because it was a non-political experience. But in fact his whole trip and show as a big bash against the United States foreign policy.

What gets me is that he thought it was novel to ask people on the streets what they thought everywhere he went and said it was the most welcoming place on earth. How naive can one get? Oh wait, Obama just made a video of his plea to get along with the leaders of Iran and they said no thanks. I guess when you have public murals on every block depicting the United States and Israel as the great Satans, then you don't really have a prayer in building a relationship.

Saturday Nights Alright for Fighting

2009-03-18T21:02:00.000-07:00

I challenged a young twerp to fight at this last weekend's hockey game. He went into the corner and I bumped him enough to get him off the puck but not enough to knock him over and he got all bent out of shape. He yelled, "are you serious!" and then he slashed his stick across my legs.

I agree I should have gotten the penalty for roughing but he should have gotten one too for slashing. So as I'm making my way to the penalty box he is mouthing off about something so I challenged him to fight and he didn't want to fight.

After some time to reflect on this, there are a few things that are of note from this brief incident. First, its really good that I did not fight. Second, he is a pussy for not fighting. Third, what was I thinking?

The little twerp is a much better hockey player than me. I am struggling for an analogy but he is good enough to score the puck every single time he is on the ice. He could score about 15 or 20 goals a game. Kind of like Joe Montana playing high school football during his prime. I think that when you are playing that far down, you have to expect that you are going to have someone taking shots at you. I play good defense and I stopped him a few times so I'm not a scrub. But what satisfaction could Joe Montana take playing high school football?

Faux Pas

2009-03-11T10:16:00.000-07:00

I know its hard to imagine but Obama made a few pretty big faux pas this last month. Its kind of being suppressed by the US press but its a big deal in the UK.

The Prime Minister of England, Gordon Brown, came to America for a meeting with Obama. As a gift of his goodwill, he gave Obama a set of wooden pens made from the wood from the HMS Resolute. For those of you who do not know, it was a British Ship that got stuck in the ice in the 19th century, was left for dead, obtained by the United States and returned to the British as a gift. Later, upon being decommissioned, Queen Elizabeth took the wood from the ship and made two hand crafted desks from it. One for her and one for their American brethren as a symbol of our sisterhood and longstanding commitment to each other. These desks are still in service today as the Resolute desk is the desk in the oval office and has been ever since. This is the same desk that is so famously pictured with Jack Kennedy and his son playing at his feet.

So leave it to the British to have a thoroughly meaningful gift. In response, Obama gave the Prime Minister of England, our longest and best ally, a gift basket of DVDs. Not only that, they were American format and not European format so the Prime Minister cannot even watch them. Additionally, Gordon Brown gave Michelle Obama some beautiful dresses from a boutique in London for her Daughters and in return, Michelle Obama gave the Brown's a toy Marine One helicopter from the White House gift shop.

But the story does not end there....

After 9/11 the British loaned the US a bust of Winston Churchill and George Bush had it in the Oval Office ever since. At the time Tony Blair knew of Bush's fondness for Churchill and noted how many times he is quoted. Additionally Churchill's mother was American. There is a duplicate bust of Churchill in the UK. Again, another symbol of our shared sisterhood of nations and being united in the face of the 9/11 tragedy. When Obama took office he decided to give it back. I guess Gordon Brown brought it up and said, no please keep it or at least put it in a suitable museum. Obama said thanks but no thanks.

Why not put it in the Lincoln Bedroom or the Treaty Room or even the Executive Offices? Why insult our greatest ally?

The only two answers I can come up with is either he hates the British or he is that dumb.

California Dreaming

2009-02-25T15:05:00.000-08:00

Lots of news last week about how California is/is not dealing with a 42 billion dollar budget deficit. There were two really good articles, one in the USA Today and the other in the Wall Street Journal. I agree with them both....which is saying that California is no longer a place where dreams come true but a place where the American dream is dying before our very eyes.

What I loved about the old California was the feeling of optimism. No matter what, you felt that the sunny days were only a prelude to a very sunny future. No more according to the articles. Out of control spending, a broken political system, illegal immigration, lack of leadership and partisanship have all been contributing factors.

I have fond memories of growing up in California and even fancied the idea of going back someday to retire in the sunshine but now I do not think I will go. Its hard to feel optimistic when priorities seem to get warped and the people get left holding the bag at the cash register for bad decisions.

Obama Must be a Citizen

2009-02-24T11:35:00.000-08:00

If you listen to Republican radio, particularly the right wing black helicopter stuff, then you no doubt have heard that Obama may not be a natural born citizen of the US. And thus, he cannot be the President of the US.

The theory goes is that he was either born in Indonesia or that he cannot be a citizen because he only had one birth parent as a citizen.

I have to admit that this was intriguing to me.

But yesterday I heard something on the radio that completely put my mind at ease about the issue. Hillary.

IF Obama was not a citizen of the US, Hillary and Bill would have exploited this after he won the New Hampshire primary to blow him out of the water. Say what you want about Hillary and Bill, I have no doubt they would go to the end of the earth to find any shred of evidence that would prove their theory. After all, it is alleged that they had something to do with Vince Foster and many others who crossed them.

So if he passes the Hilary and Bill citizenship test, he passes my test.

Monkey Business

2009-02-20T14:32:00.000-08:00

Its old news now but I am still finding friends who have not heard about the story of a 200 lb Chimpanzee who attacked its owner in Connecticut. Apparently the lady got her face bitten off and some of her fingers too. She is still in critical condition in what I think is a horribly unfortunate accident. Especially since the chimp should never had been her pet in the first place.

But back to the story for just a little bit. From what I understand the monkey was "upset" all day so she tried to give it tea with Xanax. Damn lady, don't you know better than to drug your monkey!

But seriously why did she have it in the first place? How did she get it? I know she didn't just go down to Pet Smart and get a monkey. This also reminds me of how people get baby alligators and raise them in the bathtub and the Grizzly Bear Man, Timothy Treadwell, who was eaten by his bear friends.

I think it ought to be a pretty clear indication that us humans do not need to have Chimps, Monkeys, Alligators, Bears, Tigers, Lions and any other wild beast that could seriously kill you. I mean this poor lady lived but what kind of life is she going to have without a face?

Heroes

2009-02-11T21:17:00.001-08:00

It happened a few weeks ago, but my son told me I'm his hero. That is the best thing that could have happened to me. Seriously, its awesome. He had broken one of his favorite toys and I glued it back together for him. He ran up to me and hugged my leg and said "Daddy you are my hero!"

But being a hero is a big responsiblity.

It also makes me think about something. About the same time, a friend of a friend started asking around with a ton of questions about parenthood/children....some of them were completely what I was thinking before I had kids....Do you still get to go out to eat? Can you go to movies? Do you still get to go to parties/vacations/the gym...etc.? All good questions.

But now I have the answer in context. When you are prepared to be someone's hero and not dissappoint them ever then you are ready to be a parent.

Pearl Harbor, 9/11 and Whatever is Next

2009-02-07T19:57:00.000-08:00

It is a horrible movie, but I did see parts of Pearl Harbor today. I think Josh Hartnet either had to try really hard to act and look confused in every scene or he is really confused. But I do like how they share the same girlfriend, Kate Beckinsdale. Thats classy.

Anyway it got me thinking about that event and 9/11. Those are basically the two worst days our country has had in terms of being attacked without warning. Its an ugly feeling. I vividly remember 9/11/01. It hurts me as I am sure that it does everyone.

What I am worried about now is what Obama will do when confronted with Iran's dictator, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad. Israel has said that Iran will have a nuke in less than a year. I am worried that they will use it against us, but more likely Israel. Or maybe they just hold us hostage but letting it slip that they do in fact have it and then basically selling it to us getting out of Iraq and Afghanistan. I guess what it comes down to is I do not have the confidence in Obama to do the right thing. I am not saying I know what it is, but I am certain that he doesn't know what to do. He would probably say something like "diplomacy will carry the day." And then a mushroom cloud over Tel Aviv. Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has said on several occasions that he would like to remove Israel from the Map and other assorted anti-Semite remarks.

Maybe I'm blowing this out of proportion.

Can't Buy Me Love

2009-01-29T19:32:00.000-08:00

The Valentines Day marketing is on. I've noticed that the diamond industry is turning up the heat on men like they usually do....they also do it on Christmas. Their ploy is this...connect your love for your significant other with buying her a diamond. So if you really love her, you will buy her a diamond. In the simplest terms...Diamonds=Love.

Is this emotional pull ethical? Well they are not alone...anyone remember the Michelin tire commercials where they are basically saying your family isn't safe unless you buy Michelins. How is that for emotional marketing.

Here is a sample of some diamond marketing...along with some relevant videos.

"Every Kiss Begins With Kay"

"He Went to Jared!"

"A Diamond is Forever"

"Moments that Sparkle"

But does all this work? By all accounts its very successful.

This does obligate me to bring up the wonderful feature film, Blood Diamond, Starting Leonard DiCaprio. The movie is basically a story about the diamond industry in Africa and so-called "conflict diamonds." I'm not a huge DiCaprio fan because of his politics but this was a great film. It is terribly violent but exceptionally well done and believable. If anything it does make you look at your wife's hands or ears and think to yourself how that diamond got to the states or wherever.

Last Christmas I went to the mall and I was messing around and asked the mall jewelry guy if he knew if the diamonds in the store were "conflict free." Basically the salesman took a grim look upon his face and had to go get a manager and give me some booklet saying they don't have blood diamonds and all this other corporate talking points. I guess I buy it but how do you really know.

Anyway, does buying a big ass rock on Valentines Day mean you love your significant other any more than if you bought her a box of chocolates?

Burnout

2009-01-29T19:21:00.000-08:00

I've been driving a lot lately and I am starting to get sick of a "connected" life. Cell phones, emails, conference calls, text messages, mobile web, blackberrys, and my personal worst, the radio.

While I am away from home I have to endure a ton of stuff that people claim keep you connected but they really don't. They make you feel more distant and less human...meaning less human person to person contact. I guess that is why I really like my Sunday walks with my family.

As a side note, the radio is a bunch of crap. I can pretty much recite every single mortgage company ad word for word. In the words of our new president, "Enough!" If I want to refinance, I'll F*cking call you! I did, however, get a birthday present of some great Otis Redding CDs. He is brilliant. Those CDs have kept me going this week.

Friends in Low Places

2009-01-26T22:26:00.000-08:00

While the rest of the world is concerned with bailouts, stimulous packages and the trial of Illinois Governor Blago...Washington State is dealing with a much more serious subject...Allowing dogs in bars.

Thanks to State Senators Jacobsen and Kline, bar patrons may soon be able to take their "well-behaved, leashed dog" into the local tavern with them. They may be on to something...when I'm swilling beer and playing darts, I might like to have my dog there too so he can clean up the spilled beer and peanuts. I am glad everyone's tax money is being put to good use.

Time Life Records

2009-01-22T09:21:00.000-08:00

This morning I was listening to Jack FM and "Wicked Game" by Chris Isaac came on the radio. This has always been one of my favorite songs. A tormented lover, scorned, but cannot resist the temptation and torn between love and hate. Also the video is really good too.

Then I started to think to myself as I was singing along, holy shit this song is really old. I started to think about all the other songs I was listening to that morning and singing along to...."Enjoy the Silence" by Depeche Mode and a few others from the 90s. Yes I realize I am a Gen Xer and I am ok with that really. We gave the world Nirvana and also killed hair bands. Music more than anything helps identify with a certain time and place. My dad loves 50s music.

Then I had a horrible thought. Am I going to be sitting on the sofa someday and see Carson Daly try to sell me Time Life Records from the 90s? One disc (or whatever format) of just Grunge, one disc of brit pop like U2, Morrissey, Depeche Mode, Erasure, etc.... and one disc of hip hop/rap.

I would like to think that bands like Nirvana would not sell out and be on those kinds of compilations but they are controlled (in part) by Courney Love and the other guys and they are on Guitar Hero. I guess I had an old moment but I'm ok now.

Yes, I Did Watch

2009-01-21T10:27:00.000-08:00

Its funny how one event can been seen two different ways. My Republican friends asked me "did you watch Obama?" And my Democrat friends asked "Didn't you think it was great?"

Here are my thoughts.....the best part about his speech was that it was short. I remember Clinton speaking for way too long and just getting lost in words. Bush wasn't a good speaker with the exception of the "Axis of Evil" speech which was brilliant. I also liked that Obama's speech was hopeful and touched on history and was somewhat patriotic. But the big government theme and when he said that those that cling to power from corruption and deceit stuff....well who did he think he was talking about. Governor Blago in Illinois came to my mind right away.

But yes, I do think it was a good but not great speech. The funniest part is that the only part without the teleprompter, the oath, he messed up.

Later that night while channel surfing, the wife and I flipped to the Commander in Chief's ball. All the TV people went ape-shit about what Obama's wife was wearing. I actually thought it was dumpy looking. Then Obama did some teleconference thing with some members of the Illinois contingent in Afghanistan and all he wanted to know is who was a Cubs fan and who was a White Sox fan. Obama is a White Sox fan so he got giggly that like nine out of ten where Cubs fans.

Then this morning the news kept talking about parties and balls that went on until 2am. Plus the whole thing cost 171 million bucks so it was by far the costliest inauguration ever. (Bush was 40 million, Clinton 32) So I guess I'm glad he is worried about the economy and decided to bump up the DC hotel occupancy rate and port a potty companies etc with inauguration money.

Sexting Pt.2

2009-01-13T15:30:00.000-08:00

I know you might think I'm beating a dead horse but there is more to talk about in regards to Sexting (text messages or picture mail that is explicit).

This last weekend after my hockey game, one of the guys asked another teammate why "Becky" wasn't in the stands. Yes, even at recreational hockey there are puck bunnies. The teammate responded that he wasn't seeing Becky anymore but infact just that day Becky sent him a cell phone video and pictures.

The 40 year old men on the team jumped as fast as a jackrabbit and ran over to crowd around his little cell phone screen to see Becky masturbate. I was in shock. I guess it does happen everywhere, even in semi-rural Washington State. What got me further is that apparently Becky lives with her fiance (not the teammate) and was just "bored and horny" so she started texting and sending videos/pictures to my teammate. Now I have seen everything.

Another thought, if I'm the puck bunny, can't I expect that video to be either a) seen by everyone in that guy's circle of friends or b) forwarded on to about two dozen guys and end up on the Internet or c) both. Why would they do it?

Tourists and Tourism

2009-01-04T22:38:00.000-08:00

I was just able to verbalize something I have known subconsiously for a long time: Nobody really likes tourists.

When you go on vacation, you don't want to go to a "touristy" place. You want to go to a place that isn't crowded with people with cameras around their necks and resturants with high prices and bad service. You want to go to a place that is undiscovered and basically quaint and has a local/hometown feel. Does this place exist?

When you live in an area that is either a touristy place or seasonally touristy, the locals do not like the tourists. I lived on the California coast for about 3 years, in Santa Cruz. The locals hated the tourists....who primarily came around in the summer for the Beach Boardwalk. The locals also hated the UCSC Students, which they saw as another form of tourists, although they typically stayed either nine months or forever. I never really understood that thought.....Most people who lived in Santa Cruz were former students. During the Summer, it would take about an hour to drive ten miles across town becuase all the tourists were out looking for the perfect beach to have a bonfire. But thats besides the point.

Now when I'm on vacation and I'm walking around and looking at tourist junk shops, I'm thinking to myself, "how does this store stay in business when all they sell is cheap junk." Then it hit me, I was contemplating buying cheap grass skirts for my kids friends and shell necklaces for the kids taking care of my pets. Tourists=money.

There are plenty of places one can go to that are not touristy....Hope, Arkansas. Milpitas, California. Overland Park, Kansas. But would you want to go there on purpose?

In Washington there are plenty of small towns that their entire enconomic development model is tourism. Leavenworth, Washington has the nickname of "Miracle Town." The town has only 2,000 full-time residents but spends aproximately $300,000 per year on marketing for people to come to the town. All their marketing dollars are spent attracting tourist that are within one gas tank distance from the town. And by any reasonable measure its a cascade tourist trap that bills itself as a "Bavarian Village" without any documented history of German influence. Yet they are the model for tourism economics.

Maybe I'm overthinking this but when you go on vacation, do you really think to yourself, "Lets go to a place with a ton of other tourist, all looking to do cheap day activities and then eat some overpriced food"?

Speeding

2009-01-02T13:27:00.000-08:00

The big news today is that Indy Race Car driver Danica Patrick was caught speeding in her hometown of Scottsdale, Arizona. Since when is it a big deal that race car drivers go fast? Maybe its just the delicious irony that the media can't pass up? Maybe any news that Danica Patrick makes is another excuse to put up her pretty picture (arguably) on their websites in lame attempts to get more hits and thus sell sponsor ads.....

I think I'd be disappointed if Danica Patrick, Al Unser Jr., Tony Stewart, Dale Jr., etc. didn't drive fast all the time.

In other news from the irony department there is a report from Miami that a bikini model was given a verbal warning from community auxiliary police officer that they will be cited for indecent exposure for wearing a bikini that is too small.

The Dead Pool

2008-12-31T13:45:00.000-08:00

In 1988 Clint Eastwood made a movie called "The Dead Pool." It was an above average Dirty Harry movie about a group of people who placed bets on who was going to die in the next year. What ended up happening is that people started to manipulate the outcome.

Some pretty significant things happened in this movie. Jim Carey got his big start as a rocker in the the "Welcome to the Jungle" video, and Guns and Roses played in the movie with a part, as I guess rock and roll pirates. Clint also had a great line that I love..."Why don't I start my own dead pool and put you on it." Classic.

So since then I've had a dead pool with some of my friends. It started off that we would pick who we thought would die next year....because during new years eve shows they always show the year in review and showed who died. It sounded like fun. Every year we argued about who got to pick Fidel Castro first or even (gasp) John Paul II. One year someone did pick the Pope and he died that year so we all felt bad and had a one year hiatus and changed the game up.

Now its turned into something less morbid as we've added categories for Divorced, Broken Up, Arrested, Rehab, Pregnant.....so its less about just dead people and more about general pop culture. I also started to find out that other people have similar dead pools....

So I wanted to know who else is doing that and what they are doing so I can improve my game with my friends. If you've never heard of this before, its a great conversation starter at a new years party.

New Years Resolutions

2008-12-29T14:58:00.000-08:00

So does anyone still do New Years Resolutions? I always hear about the most popular resolutions: losing weight and stop smoking. For the first month of the year, my gym is a total zoo with the newbies struggling to get some momentum on their newly honed workout routines. Most of these people are gone in a few weeks. Why don't they stick with it?

Yes, I have had new years resolutions many times. I've stuck with some and others I cannot remember the next December.

I did have one new years resolution that I stuck with the whole year through. Many years ago I worked in a six story building on the sixth floor. I resolved that I would take the stairs every time, up and down for the entire year. I followed through. I was huffing and puffing (at the time the only thing I did for exercise was surfing) for the first month, but I did it. My co-workers thought I was nuts when after a huge lunch out they all piled into the elevator. I just decided it was something I was going to do and follow through. What made me follow though? Was it because it was obtainable, something I had to do every day? Or is it just pure willpower?

This kind of begs the question...what if we could do new years resolutions for other people? Would you want Obama to start speaking without using the teleprompter? Would you want your neighbors to cut their lawn more than once per summer or would you want your boss to give you something simple like clearer communication? Or would you just want Lindsay Lohan to resolve to wear a bra.

Sequels and Franchises

2008-12-22T13:58:00.000-08:00

This weekend I saw the latest Indiana Jones movie. I think it was called the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull or something like that. It was really bad. Shia Labeouf at one point was swinging through the Peruvian jungle with monkeys. The other part that was pretty bad was that Harrison Ford had gotten so old. I remember Harrison Ford being terribly good looking with strong muscles and fantastic heroism. Now he is over 60 and mostly grey. The music was good but the storyline was overworked and overall just bad.

I guess all three previous Indiana Jones movies had supernatural as a part of the movie, even the second one which was about some stones in India. But this one had a magical crystal skull that mezmerized people and made them crazy? Sort of mixed up without a purpose.

Why did George Lucas and Stephen Speilberg make such a bad movie? Was it just money?

I just got me thinking that sequels are just never really as good as the first movie. Did anyone see Basic Instinct 2? They tend to be rushed into theatres quickly while the buzz is still going over the previous movie. There are some exceptions where the sequels were just as good or better. I'm a big fan of Terminator 2. Arnold still looked young and his side kick kid was good and so was Sarah Connor. I also liked Aliens a whole lot. Sigourney Weaver kicked ass in that movie and the creatures were truely brilliant.

It also begs the question of franchises....like Star Wars, Star Trek, The Matrix, James Bond, Tom Clancey Movies, and the Godfather (or is that a Trilogy?). If you get an established brand, I guess you take it to its logical conclusion, which in most cases is they have made as much money as possible so they are done. My question is, what is the best sequel and the worst sequel?

Not For Sale at Any Price

2008-12-17T20:05:00.000-08:00

Its old news now but the Governor of Illinois tried to sell Obama's senate seat. I get it. I've told people forever that politicians care about three things: Money, TV, and getting elected/re-elected. They will do whatever they can to gain any of those three.

So Governor Blagojevich is on tape dropping f-bombs talking about selling Obama's senate seat. Then Obama says that he or his people have never had contact with Governor Blogy-vich. Whatever, then it turns out that Rham Emanuel, Obama's Chief of Staff, is tapped 21 times talking about the selection. This is starting to sound like Clinton Years, V2.0.

Its a Good Thing

2008-12-13T21:36:00.000-08:00

Martha Stewart has had a very interesting life. She is a multi-billionaire who has also done time in prison for insider trading but loves to bake and scrapbook. She is seen as an iron clad bitch and down home motherly at the same time. How does she do it?

I recently came across a show on the Fine Living Channel called "Whatever Martha." Its hosted by her daughter Alexis and her friend Jennifer. What they do is watch old Martha Stewart Living shows and make fun of Martha and generally show how bitchy filthy rich kids can be. But the great part is that although Alexis comes across as a total bitch, she also comes across totally honest. She rips Martha for her choice in clothes, especially her baggy high waisted mom-jeans, blue shirts and short shorts in the garden.

This week Alexis spent about 10 minutes talking about how she spent years in therapy over anxiety in college. Then Jennifer talked about her struggles with weight and then they ripped Martha a new a-hole for her crappy trifle and "brick like" rice crispy treats. During the show Martha talked about how she used to make rice crispy treats for her Daughter Alexis. Alexis practically jumped off the sofa and yelled "Oh no she didn't you lied, I never got them once!" It was a very good thing.

When I first saw it, I thought, why the hell does Martha allow this? Why doesn't she sue her daughter? She must be astrainged from her daughter right? No.

Martha's genius is she produces the show. Thats right, Martha is the person behind it. So if you love Martha or hate her, there is a show for you. Check out Whatever Martha whenever you get a chance, you will not be disappointed.

Winter Weather

2008-12-12T15:38:00.000-08:00

This weekend the weather in the Puget Sound is going to be terrible. Not that it has not been terrible since August 31st but more terrible. Tonight its supposed to rain and snow and then be in the 20s and 30s for about a week.

Even thought this is Washington and people are supposed to be used to this crap, I love how everyone rushes the stores before hand and stock up like its going to be a complete retail shut down for a month. All the clerks around town kept asking me "are you ready for the storm?" I just played along and said yes. But I should have said "oh I don't know, I have to put on the storm shutters and get in the basement."

A couple years ago I attended the Sunnyside Lighted Farm Implement Parade in December. For westsiders, Sunnyside is in the Yakima Valley, just West of the Tri-Cities. Anyway it was 9 outside with the wind blowing. Now that is cold.

A few of our friends even told us that they do not go out in the snow or when it rains too much. I'm thinking, damn they should be glad they do not live in Spokane or Pullman.

When its snowing, that is the best time for kids. I spent alot of time as a kid in Yosemite during the winter and it was the best part of Christmas vacation. So parents, lighten up and let the kids run outside and throw snowballs.

Sexting

2008-12-10T10:09:00.000-08:00

So the news finally broke that teens are using their cell phones to "sex message" each other. I think this has been a long time coming. Last year I remember when High School Musical Star Vanessa Hudgens got in trouble for "sexting" her boyfriend Zac Efron. I thought, "thats just a Hollywood thing." Hudgens never denied it, infact through her publicist she confirmed it. I guess the photos left no doubt it was her instead of a photoshop. But according to the news, almost every kid out there with a cell phone is taking nude pictures of themselves and sending to their significant others.

What gets me is that this is probably big stuff for high school boys. They probably love it. And they probably show all their buddies and the forward the pictures to everyone they know. It does not take a rocket scientist to think that someday that picture will be seen by everyone in the high school or your town.

On the other hand it is technically kiddie porn since many of these kids are committing crimes by forwarding them to their friends. I guess the recipients are not really guilty of anything since they didn't really have a clue that they might be getting such a photo. That is unless they asked to receive a copy and knew that the person was under 18.

So do we go after all these kids who are forwarding these messages or just chalk it up to a new generation of kids doing what kids do?

Resturants with Kids

2008-12-10T09:55:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine recently asked me "what are you doing for New Year's Eve?" I laughed a little and replied, nothing since I have kids. I do not resent the question or the person who asked. The person is probably my best friend. But people with kids do not really go out on new years and get blasted and party till midnight. I can hardly stay up to watch the 11pm news without passing out.

But what really got me thinking is going out with kids in general to eat. When I do get a rare evening with my wife and without kids I always want to go out to eat. The reason is simple....I get to eat uninterrupted. No getting up for sippy cups, stopping someone from throwing their noodles, no bargaining...("if you eat three more bites, you can be done.") I also do not have to pick up after....no goldfish crackers on the floor, cleaning up a high chair plate or washing someone's face with a warm washcloth to get off the sticky stuff.

I remember when I did not have kids. I would make plans with the wife and our other kidless friends all the time. We would go out for a promotion, birthday, summer night out, graduation, any reason really to try out a new place or revisit a familiar one.

So that is why I'm willing to pay five dollars for a beer and 20 dollars for an entree to sit and have peace and maybe relax a little with the wife.

Sean Avery and Elisha Cuthbert

2008-12-04T10:02:00.001-08:00

What was Sean Avery thinking? He went to Calgary (he already insulted Canada many years ago, supposedly by calling French Canadian hockey players "soft" and "frogs") and then he says that his ex-girlfriend, the TV host and model Elisha Cuthbert, "sloppy-seconds." He allegedly was referring to Dion Phaneuf's now involvement with Cuthbert. So thats a really dumb move. I guess that takes away the possibility of Avery and Cuthbert of ever getting back together again.

But a few points to be made. First, its insulting to Cuthbert. Then, and probably more potentially painful to Avery is that Phanuff is one of the NHL's toughest guys, a hard hitter and a guy who does not hesitate to drop the gloves. Was Sean Avery looking to get his ass kicked? Was he looking to undermine his team? Did he really think that by calling the beautiful girlfriend of a tough guy "sloppy seconds" that it would throw Phaneuf off his game?

I don't know what he was thinking except that he was probably not thinking at all. Then the NHL suspends him immediately so he cannot play in Calgary. That was probably a good thing, especially in the short therm. I bet Phaneuf would have gone Marty McSorely on him and probably killed him.

But it does beg the question what athletes can and can't say, ignoring for the moment, what is in good taste. So lets say Avery (or anyone in the NHL) says something like, "gee its hard right now because my ex-wife screwed me in my divorce." Is that out of line? Should there be some sort of free speech argument to be made? I think the NHL should have done what they did by suspending Avery and Brett Hull is an idiot for signing him to a four year contract in the beginning.

Doorbuster

2008-12-03T16:09:00.000-08:00

When did the term "Doorbuster" become common lingo? I got the newspaper for the day after Thanksgiving and its always full of the sale ads. This year, though, every retailer used the term doorbuster.

The story of the woman in New York who was trampled at a doorbuster event at Wal-Mart is very sad. Supposedly in the lawsuit the petitioner said that Wal-Mart should have known that selling a 50-inch plasma for $798 would lead to pandemonium and thus, resulted in her death. I guess her family is saying it was gross negligence.

Thats not the point of this post though. I seem to remember the day after thanksgiving being the "day after thanksgiving" sales. I guess "doorbuster" or "black friday" has a better ring to it. Maybe it was polled and focus grouped and found that it was a better term with consumers.

Am I bothered? I guess so, but not really but my point (yes I'm making a point) is that retailers will do pretty much anything to get you to part with your money and making up a term out of thin air is not really concern.

Texting

2008-11-26T13:18:00.000-08:00

I don't know what has happened to teenagers these days....there I've said it. Now I am officially old. When I go down any main street these days I seen teens with "crooked neck syndrome." They have their necks bent down in a 45 degree angle and rapidly texting away on their mobile phones. The trifecta is when they also have the hoodie on their head and white iPod headphones in at the same time.

I've seen teens texting away with eachother at the same coffee shop or sporting event and even in the same room. They text away while at work, although they attempt to keep it on the down low by keeping it in the pocket....and every now and then you can see their neck assume the 45 degree position and then they pound away for a few seconds and then back to work. What has happened with talking?

My dad's generation was writing letters. My brothers generation was talking on the phone, and the lucky kids had their own line. My generation was/is email. Now its texting. Does this mean that technology is forcing our attention spans shorter and shorter or the other way around? I do my fair share of texting, about 50 a month. I regularly go to meetings where the downtrodden parent complains about a $500 cell phone bill for a teen who just started texting. Note to parents: get unlimited texting before this happens to you.

Side note: Is the day before Thanksgiving the slowest day of the year or is it the day after Christmas? Does anyone really work these days or are they just lost productivity all over the world?

Will He or Won't He

2008-11-25T08:45:00.000-08:00

In the remaining days of the Bush twilight, will he pardon any of his people before he leaves office? Perhaps the most famous pardon is Richard Nixon by Gerald Ford. In the Clinton Administration, he famously pardoned Mark Rich on charges of tax evasion and illegal trading with Iran. They were indicted while they were in Switzerland. The pair failed to return to the U.S. following the indictment, and were on the FBI's Most Wanted List for many years. It just so happened that Rich and his wife had made huge donations to the Clinton campaign and the Clinton Presidential Library. Many people believed that he bought a pardon.

I kind of have a feeling that Bush will have about a dozen or so that he will Pardon. I bet he will take care of his own seeing that there is such a rabid far left crowd that has been clamoring for his impeachment, even to this date. I guess I don't have a problem with that. When you work for a president, it should be expected that you are not going to be hung out to dry.

But getting back to the who, I bet former AG Alberto Gonzales gets a pardon for his alleged role in firing US Attorneys.....although it is perfectly legal and Clinton did it too....just Gonzales likely lied about it. I also would not be surprised if Ramos and Campeon, the border patrol agents who shot a drug dealer in the back for what they saw was a gun and who allegedly threatened the pair.

I think the bigger question is does Bush pardon anyone in the Military who was allegedly involved in water boarding of KSM and other high profile terror detainees. Its hard to say really....maybe Bush asks Obama if he plans on going after his old buddies or if Obama just wants to move on. I think that if Hillary were elected, she would not go after the old Bush crowd. She is kind of old school in that regard....and Bush didn't go after Clinton folks.

Twilight

2008-11-19T15:35:00.000-08:00

So there has been so much about the new movie Twilight, set in Forks, Washington, that I am obligated to blog about it.

I missed out on the first five minutes of myspace so I guess I am missing out on the first five years of Twilight. Apparently its about a vampire who falls in love with a non-vampire chick but the town of Forks has a ton of other vampires that want to get the girl...."bella."

What gets me is that Author Stephanie Meyer apparently wrote the book (there are several) before ever having been to Forks. I can't stand on a hill and shout "you've never been to Forks so how the F*** can you write about it".....But I have been to that area before and it is truely the end of the earth. If you've been to the woods, take away any reasonable road to get to the woods and then throw in some confusing locals who are out of touch with reality and that is what that area is like.

I started to do some research and it is kinda viral marketing and kind of in your face. My town is about 150 miles away from Forks but there are fliers up all over town. Online its almost like the whole Blair Witch thing but not quite. I guess the books are like Harry Potter turns Goth.

I don't mean to sound bitter (do I sound bitter?) but big things like this don't happen in the sticks so I'm curious. Would I still be curious if Twilight was set in Boston or San Antonio or Atlanta? Probably not. Maybe that's a success recipe for Hollywood. Take something intriguing like small town America and overlay it with something that has a cult following like vampires.

My question is, did I really miss the first five years of Twilight or just the first five minutes.

David Cook New CD Soon

2008-11-18T09:51:00.000-08:00

David Cook from American Idol season seven has a new CD out very soon. I saw this article today in USA Today about him. I think the author made an effort to give him a fair shake but also pointedly said that he is not going to be that good and that Chris Daughtry is better.

I really liked David Cook on the show. Yes, he was much more my style than David Archuletta or anyone else since Bo Bice. I also liked Michael Johns with his soothing Aussie style. For a few seasons of AI I just could not take all the Aretha Franklin covers and the big voiced ballads.

David Cook was/is comfortable in his skin and just edgy enough to make me want to see what he is going to do next. But the author of the USA Today article may be right....can he make a commercial success in the music industry today? Given, he is not the next coming of Kurt Cobain and he is not cute like Carrie Underwood or Taylor Swift....Cook's style goes back to grunge which has definitely seen its day. His difficult task is going to take grunge and make it modern and appealing to todays crowd who are perhaps already listening to The Killers, Coldplay and Death Cab for Cutie.

I personally hope that David Cook hits the big time and does extremely well. I think the pop scene needs a healthy injection of rock, kind of like John Cougar Mellencamp, Bryan Adams and even Nickelback.

Junk Mail

2008-11-17T10:06:00.000-08:00

I get alot of junk mail. Yes, I mean the old fashioned junk mail that comes in the mailbox...I mean real paper. This last week I started to get all the Christmas stuff from Lands End, Eddie Bauer, Victoria's Secret (about 90 pages) and others. But the most noteworthy was the catalog from Urban Outfitters.

I opened it up and saw many pictures of scruffy, skinny dudes looking like they really need a job and a clean pair of clothes. Really is this supposed to sell itself? Are Urban Outfitters customers to think to themselves, "yeah I want to wear a rusty shirt, that will really help me score some chicks." Or do chicks think, "If only I could find a man with a dirty shirt...."

Not that I am the fashion guru but what the hell would Tim Gunn say when he saw this crap.

Food for Thought

2008-11-11T12:24:00.000-08:00

A few articles today scattered around America about the former Whitehouse Chef, Walter Scheib. The gist is that the President and his family get to eat whatever they want, without reason. Chelsy Clinton wanted Mac and Cheese from Kraft in the blue box, no exceptions. (supposedly Obama loves Chili) That also got me thinking about what I would want if I could have whatever I wanted, anytime day or night without exception. Would I force myself to be healthy or would I stock up on Full Sail Pale Ale and Round Table Pizza? Would I make the chef brew beer especially to my liking....yeah a full hop ale with an alcohol content about 6.5%.

That really doesn't surprise me that the first family gets whatever they want. I have to say that the most powerful man in the world should eat well and get whatever he wants to have a happy tummy. But what got me, and whats not in the article that I can find, is supposedly the President has to pay for his own food....Not state dinners and official functions, but every day oatmeal. Maybe I'm a traditionalist but I think if we are going to make the man live at the Whitehouse instead of his hometown or somewhere in DC, at least pay for his pizza and beer. My question for discussion is should we (taxpayers) pay for the President's food?

2008 Election Post Mortem

2008-11-07T14:32:00.000-08:00

The 2008 election is over and there will be volumes written as to why Obama won and why McCain lost. My thoughts follow one theme....most centrist voters hated George W. Bush and this was yet another election about Bush/Bush Doctrine.

But we have to go back to the election of 2004 (and even 2000, where the start of the mistrust of Bush began) to properly place this election in context. In 2004 Bush beat a very experienced Senator in John Kerry. Bush was able to convince the electorate that he was the most qualified to stay the course during a time of war. Americans were not confident about Kerry coming in midstream to manage a war. Liberals resented the whole "Swift Boat" episode and blamed Bush even though it was not associated with his campaign.

In 2006 Republicans lost significant seats in the House and Senate as the war in Iraq drug on. Bad PR and ineffective communication from Bush contributed to these loses.

By 2008, people were completely ready to be done with George W. Bush, the Iraq War, the Bush Doctrine and his management style or lack thereof. Obama won by tapping into this building anger and antipathy towards Bush. In my opinion, Hillary Clinton would have beat McCain as well because of this reason. Obama was able to use his wonderful skills as an orator and his message of change to propel him to the white house. Never once did his message of McCain = Bush fall hallow on the media.

McCain had is own problems. He was by extension a foot solider for Bush. He was right to support the surge in Iraq when the Democrats (and most Americans) wanted to cut and run. I could just imagine the scene of the US Helicopter lifting off from Hanoi in 1975 all over again but this time in Baghdad. I also believe that we could have cut and run and there would have been a literal killing fields scenario for anyone who had supported the US/British. Thousands would have been killed. General Petraeus deserves a hell of alot of credit. But beyond McCain being right, it was somewhat too late for the attention span of the US. It was too easy for Obama to point at McCain and his voting record and say "no third term for Bush."

McCain also did not posses a personality that inspired people to get excited. He has an incredible personal story and seems to genuinely love his country. Americans from blue states and red states realize that and are proud of him.

Where do the Republicans go now for leadership? Is that Sarah Palin? I do not think she is done and will just hole up in Wasila or Juneau and never be heard from again. She excited the Republican base (something McCain did not do) so she will be around. But is she able to do more than rally the base? Can she increase and lead the party like Reagan did? Who leads the house Republicans? Where is Newt Gingrich? Does he just continue to hang out with Sean Hanity and write books? Until the party has a leader and a BIG vision, they will clearly be in the minority.

Where do the Democrats go now that they are in power with both houses of congress and the whitehouse? My guess is that Obama will get a very lengthy honeymoon period where he gets to work on his campaign issues of middle class tax cuts, the economy and the environment. However after that, the Democrat committee chairmen (and women), Washington Lobbyists and interest groups will line up and expect to be fed as they helped put Obama in office.

I personally wish Obama the best of luck. Both for me and for our country.

Stealing My Salmon

2008-11-04T12:37:00.000-08:00

One of my son's favorite things to do around the fall is to go to the tribal Salmon hatchery down the street from my house and watch the Salmon. The Salmon hatchery is located on a stream that leads to the Puget Sound, and also eventually runs through my back yard.

But before the spawning salmon can get to my backyard, the stream is diverted and the salmon have to swim up a salmon ladder into a big ass pond where they either a) die b) die trying to make it into a culvert fed by a water pump which circulates the water, or c) are gathered up in nets and have their brains smashed in by a tribal member with a wooden billy club. Then their flesh is cut from their dead bodies and eaten.

My son loves watching them swim fast and then jump up in the air and try to get into the water pump culvert. Again and again, they swim as fast as they can, jump and fail. Around the front of the facility is the aforementioned stream and the wire grate that blocks my backyard and the salmon ladder that leads to death for the fish. This last weekend we were standing over the ladder and one of the big guys jumped up and spashed and we got all wet. Pretty cool to watch.

I've taken my wife and my brother and my dad to the hatchery too. They all agree I should use the cover of night and go down to the creek/hatchery and use my own net to take some fish. If nature had its way, they'd be swimming through my back yard by the hundreds, where I would no doubt be able to catch them (legally of course and in season). So I keep thinking, those fish should be mine, or at least be able to follow their manifest destiny to continue up the stream, into my backyard and then die.

Not that I'm going to but lets say that I go down there and steal a fish or two...liberate them from the awful future that awaits them by having their brains bashed in or just having their flesh turn white, a big ass hump develop on their backs and then literally rot away while alive. Would I get caught? Would they take me to tribal jail? Would I have to post bail for "grand theft larceny, two counts: one count for a King Salmon and one count for a Silver Salmon? Would I have to check that box on job applications "Yes, I have been convicted of a crime. If yes, Please explain......I stole two salmon from the creek by my house, but I was real hungry and I didn't want him to rot away or get his head bashed in by a Native American with a short billy club."

I guess that would explain it enough.

Yes! I can still score

2008-11-03T11:02:00.000-08:00

Last night at my hockey game in Bremerton I scored a goal and assisted on two others....So three points in a 12-6 win. It was a wrist shot from a long rebound from the top of the circles that went five hole. Felt good to finally find the back of the net, I was afraid that I'd lost my scoring touch.

Also, the San Jose Sharks won last night 5-3. I'm liking what Setaguchi is doing, basically shooting all the time. He looks like Cheechoo from a couple of seasons ago. Playing on Thornton's line will do that for you...you have to be ready to shoot at all times.

In the words of Barak Obama, "Enough!" I've had it with both candidates. So much talk about nothing. Am I to beleive everything I see on TV? If I am, then McCain is really George W. Bush's Mini Me and Obama wants to disband our Armed Forces and give all my money to my next door neighbors.

New Book

2008-10-31T11:01:00.000-07:00

I just started to read Chuck Kloserman's new book, Downtown Owl. Although I'm only in the first chapter, its quite possibly the best book I've read this year.

Chuck references a book by George Orwell, Animal Farm. This incidentally is the very first book that I read. I mean I read other books but this is the first book that I started reading and didn't put down until I was done. Then I wanted to read it again and again. At the time I believe I was in Junior High. Until them reading was really just an exercise I did because I had to, now I wanted to read. It really changed things for me. Not because I was enamored with a story about pigs and farm animals, but because it was well written and had a relevant human story.

Is this universal? Is the first time for everything the best and mind shattering experience it is supposed to or is it a big let down? I remember when my son ate ice cream for the first time about the time he was one year old...he said "mmmm" and smiled and wanted more. We let him have the whole thing and didn't care that he got really sticky. I also remember the first time I scratched out a property tax check....not the same feeling but it was enlightening.

Virgin Experience....Not Really

2008-10-31T10:46:00.000-07:00

I've been blogging pretty requently for my work and its all good, but everyone tells me I need to blog on my own to say what is really on my mind. I'm proud of my EMBARQ blog but it is kind of cheesy in a sense because I'm always pushing the products and services....so now its time to leave the nest and go out on my own. Hopefully I can entertain because without that why bother to read. So this will be my first post and I'm going to copy my last post from the EMBARQ blog about Chuck Klosterman.

But a first post should really be about me and what my perspective is like. I grew up for the most part in Silicon Valley. I've also lived in Tuolumne County, Humboldt County, and Santa Cruz County. I've worked in San Benito County, Monterey County and Santa Clara County. My first computer was an Apple MacIntosh which kicked ass. My first job was teaching sailing at Pinecrest Lake in the Sierra Nevada Mountains for the Boy Scouts of America. Yes, I am an Eagle Scout, which has burdened me with telling the truth my whole life because everyone expects it.

Three years ago I moved to Washington State to give my family a great opportunity to have an American Dream. I work hard and enjoy my life in the rain. Did I mention rain? Washington is just like California except 300 days or sun its 300 days or rain...really. I describe Washington to people from California by saying...take everything you own and put it in your driveway and then pour water on it. Then do that for 300 days straight. A fisherman from Bremerton told me, "there are two seasons in Washington, Winter and July 1st." Almost compeletely true.

Yes, it is halloween today and no I'm not dressing up. Jim Rome says its a day for kids to celebrate, not adults dressing up in stupid or slutty costumes in the office. I tend to agree. Although I am going to a party tonight and am looking forward to the kids looking cute but also the adults looking like idiots.